


The Letters

by stupidityeatsme



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: it was supposed to be just platonic love but i guess it counts as phan idk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-06
Updated: 2015-04-06
Packaged: 2018-03-21 13:45:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3694514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stupidityeatsme/pseuds/stupidityeatsme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Phil writes some letters to his best friend in the world at his therapist's recommendation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. January 1st, 2016

Hey Dan,

Happy new year!!! I’m writing these because my therapist said it would help. I don’t know if it will or not, but I really hope it does. I haven’t done anything except sit around and listen to your favorite songs and cry all day. I haven’t showered since that day…

Ha, not that that’s something I”m proud of. In fact, I’m kind of ashamed of it. We were so lucky, Dan. Our lives were just barely getting started.

Honestly? I’m glad I got to spend the best years of my life with you. I don’t know where I’d be without you.

There’s really not much to write about without crying. What am I even going to do with this letter once I’m done with it? Not like I can send it to you. I wonder if you’re able to read it from wherever you are. I hope you can. I’m sure these letters will be important. And I really want to keep in touch with you, even if you are gone.

I love you, Daniel Howell. I loved you, I love you, and I always will love you.

Love,  
Phil


	2. January 2nd, 2016

Dan,

I think you’ll be surprised to hear that this is the first day since November that I’ve talked to someone other than my therapist. I talked to the pizza guy! It was hard because he looked so much like you. Did you reincarnate as a pizza man? That would be cool. I’d get to meet you all over again, and live with you all over again, and be happy with you all over again.

But wouldn’t you die all over again? My god, Dan, why’d you have to do it?

I’m sorry. That was rude. It wasn’t your fault. I mean, it was, but it wasn’t your fault that you felt the need to go through with it.

I wish I had been a better friend. I shouldn’t have been so blind, really. I should’ve known by the way you talked about anything and everything that you were doing worse than you let on. I should’ve known. We’ve known each other for what, 6 years now? I should’ve known, I should’ve fucking known!!!

I gotta go now. Pizza is getting cold and I have some Fall Out Boy to listen to.

Sincerely yours,  
Phil


	3. January 5th, 2016

Dan,

I’m sorry I haven’t written to you in a few days. I was busy forgetting about it, and I haven’t visited my therapist in ages.

I don’t even know why I’m writing this, Dan. You died back in November and it’s January. I should’ve calmed down by now, gotten back to normal life. But for some reason, I just can’t get over you.

And either way, I want to talk to you. It’s just as if we were sending letters to each other in real life, eh? Except that I’m the only one sending letters. And it’s not real. Because they’re just shoved in a drawer, never to be seen again.

I’ve gotta go make a video. My subscribers have been so worried since I haven’t been using the internet much at all. I’ve basically been ignoring them.

Sincerely,  
Phil


End file.
